As Demo Day approaches, the Snowball team wanted to get in the spirit of the app. So we sat down and wrote our own collaborative story. The prompt (thank you Reddit): “You are a patron saint, but you’ve never been told of what. Now, you’re trying to find out.”
Even as my father told me I could never believe him, I had lived a life that no deity would be proud of, and yet here I am.
I’ve searched so long for my destiny. I know I am a guardian of some, but have never been sure. Do I watch over the wanderers? The fast food addicts? The people who vape and blow the steam into others’ faces?
A part of me has always wondered, but I was too scared to find out. I’m afraid that I can’t live up to the answer. But after what happened, I knew I had to search to find out who I am.
I remembered when I was six years old, I had a toy car. A vampire sat in the driver’s seat. She looked like a toy police officer, but I knew the truth. She was a vampire, the mother of all vampires.
Why is the vampire 6 inches tall you ask? She refused to tell me. Apparently there are quite a few of them scattered around hiding as toys and other small objects sitting around houses.
It’s hard to tell whether what you’re seeing is actually a tiny vampire or just a glass figurine. It can be quite a scare when you pick up a beautiful ornament only for it to wink at you.
However, the scariest of all was none other than Glassferatu. He is a ruthless murderer who lives on people’s countertops waiting for the perfect chance to strike.
Glassferatu and I fought for ten weeks straight in 1997, but I had a lingering suspicion that we were approaching our relationship the wrong way. Even as the vampire slashed at my throat, I wanted to help him.
There’s something so endearing about a bad boy! After all, being a statue must be tough, most people “like” you are soulless pieces of glass, Things were beginning to really look up between Glassferatu and I until my sister came home and accidentally knocked him off of my dresser, and I watched in horror as he began to fall.
“GLASSY, NO,” I shouted as we both dived to catch him from certain death. Our elbows bumped and as we hit the ground, so did Glassferatu. He broke apart with a soft tinkling noise.
The glass erupted into a pleasant looking snow, almost as serene as the inside of a snow globe. As soon as the shock of the situation wore off we both began to internalize what happened. However, even as we were looking at the tiny pieces of glass falling lightly to the floor, every single one of them spontaneously combusted.
She turned around and looked at me with tears in her eyes. “I’m so sorry, Edward. I know you really liked that toy.” She tried to sweep up the fragments but they all burned cleanly away.
“How dare you?!” Edward screamed at his mom. “You could have saved them!”
“You knew how important they were to me!” In that moment Edward knew what he had to do. He stormed down to the basement in a rage and opened the old trunk his dad had given him.
In the trunk, he found a magic wand his father had left for him. “Only use this in special cases, Edward,” his father had told him. He knew he had to punish his mother for what she had done.
I pulled myself out of my memories. I pulled out the wand. “I won’t forget, Father.” I knew who I was supposed to protect now, what I was patron saint of —
I am the patron saint of Tasty videos.
Thanks for reading! It got a little weird, but that’s the whole point of this app. We hope you had just as much fun reading this as we had writing it.
We also have our final promo video online:
See you all this Saturday at Demo Day!
- Jackie, Kailey, Eitan, Jonathan, Mantu